Self Care Sunday

Self-Care Sunday, March 27th, 2022

My husband said yesterday that this weekend was Angela weekend. I gave him a look that was said “um No…” to which he responded, “yes it has been, think about what you have done this weekend.” He then rattled off all the things we had done and how really it was all centered around what I wanted to do. So yes maybe he was right. Let me tell you about my weekend.

To start I went up to my Alma Mater to hang out with my professor and good friend. He was having a get-together of German students, with pizza, soccer, and just general hanging out. My husband was supposed to come but had to work, so I just went and got to hang out without the kiddies. Somehow I got convinced to participate in the soccer game. A few quick things about me, soccer, and well running in general. I usually don’t play soccer or run much (I have a bad knee that hates when I run), but here I was in the middle of a soccer game with kids half my age (it hurts me to say half my age.) I had to actually run, kick the ball and in general be a part of the game. It was fun, I even scored, but when we were done I had to go back to my friend’s house and ice down my knee. I got to hang out there with other adults for a few hours before going home. So for sure Friday was a day for me.

Now we get to Saturday. I had an event at my friend Rodney’s Coffee Shop (check his shop out here) so again no kids. I love going to his shop for events because even when it is slow we still enjoy each other’s company and listening to great music. After this event ended he was hosting a paint party at the shop which I, of course, signed my husband and me up to participate in. For all of you that don’t know my husband does not do art, but he knew I wanted him to come, so he sucked it up (got coverage for 2 hrs from work) and came to paint. I am going to assume he had a good time and we both had some nice paintings in the end.

Okay, so yes so far Friday and Saturday seem like a me focused day, but we still have Sunday. Sunday was also for me. I met some friends at a coffee shop (a Sunday routine), without my husband (still working) and kids. Then I sat here writing this masterpiece for you and will conclude my day with having book club. I love the Sundays I have book club. We started our book club the year before the dreaded Covid hit, and the person that started it decided not to continue running it during the Covid year, and I took over because having book club is great. The ladies that come to meet up are amazing and the books we pick are normally excellent so I couldn’t let it fall apart.

A strange but good book.

Maybe my husband was right about this being Angela weekend. I think I needed this weekend though. Work kinda sucked this week, ending with a few people yelling at me for things I was not in control of, so a weekend with relaxing fun activities was just what I needed. I may be in pain (I am never playing soccer again), and I may have been gone most of the weekend, but the fellowship I have gotten to enjoy was worth it. I do hate that my husband had to miss most of the weekend with me, usually, we do all of these activities together, but I am glad I still was able to do things this weekend that made me feel good.

What I want you to take from this is that sometimes you can have a YOU weekend. Yup take a weekend or most of a weekend for you and what you need to feel better. I didn’t plan to have this weekend be all about what I needed but I am glad it worked out this way. When you get the chance to do things for yourself, take it, but also try to find a way to do the same for others in your family when their need arises. We all need to remember we function better when we have had time for ourselves.

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Self-Care Sunday, March 13th, 2022

Does anyone else feel like the last 2 years have been a whirlwind of crazy stuff going on all to end up with war? It is like everywhere you turn there is something going on that can take you away from yourself, pull your focus, increase your worry, make your anxieties skyrocket. We can see this a lot with our kids who have less of a capacity to handle all the crazy that is happening. The question is how do you worry about yourself and your health and wellness when you know there are people across the globe that are suffering and having to run for their lives? How can you focus on what may seem trivial to you or others in comparison to the lives being lost? What do we tell our children to help them get through it all?

First I think the most important thing to remember is that even with all the crazy going on, all the war and death, it is important to realize that if you don’t take care of yourself then there is no way you can be part of anything that may help with the situations at hand. If you are run down and out of sync with yourself, you can not possibly think you can help in any of these other larger situations.

Secondly, I think it is important to gauge what you are capable of in terms of helping. Are you in a position to help in a large-scale way, or do you need to set your focus on a more locally centered effort? We all want to feel like we have done our part have reached out and supported what we felt was important but that does not have to happen on a global scale sometimes it is just as important to focus your efforts on something more local and grow from there.

The only step that is important at the beginning is making sure that before you help others you have yourself in the right state of mind. You can not provide help or ideas for others if you are all out of sorts. Take a moment and write down what you want to accomplish and how you see yourself getting there. What is needed for you to make this happen? Do you need a certain amount of your time each day to be ready for your goals? Or do you need to find the right group of people to help you get there? Are the things you are involved in now helping you move toward or away from what you want?

Once you have laid out what it is you want and the path you wish to take to get there you can better prepare and plan your route to that goal. Start with the small easy goals and work your way to the larger ones, some of which may include providing the help and support to others that you wish for. Maybe if you are someone that wants to do more for the people suffering across the globe your first step may be to donate money or help raise awareness in your local circles. Starting here while working towards a larger scale effort will keep you from feeling overwhelmed and like you never seem to help.

Maybe you are in a situation similar to mine where you are not sure what you want to do to help. I don’t know what I want to do, or how I should handle the things I see or hear about, so my effort has been focused on trying to be sure my kids understand what is happening. It is just as important for those of us with children to focus on helping them cope and understand the things they hear and see. Teaching them is what will help later generations make what we hope are more informed decisions.

So this Self-Care Sunday message as a whole is to try your best not to let the crazy and horrible take a root in your life. Take a moment and make a plan on how you can handle the things going on without losing yourself or letting it harm your children. Take a break from the world and the news when needed it will still be there tomorrow and you can not be a part of any solution big or small if you are not good yourself.

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Self-Care Sunday, February 20th, 2022

In the last few weeks, I have discovered a few things, one being Rosemary Gladstar. I am glad that I have discovered her and her knowledge of herbal medicine which is something that I am just starting to learn. What I loved the most while looking through her posts is the quote above, “Give power to the things you love most in your life, those that nourish the spirit of joy and gratitude.” When I saw this I realized it is the best mindset to have. What are the things you love the most in your life? What things should you nourish?

This is something that we seem to forget to do as we rush around from day to day. Do we take the time that we should to nourish our spirit? This weekend I spent time nourishing my spirit by getting out and working in the garden. It would seem to many that working in the garden is just another form of work, which yes I guess it is, however being out in nature in the sun and working in the dirt just makes you feel so at peace in the end. I enjoy taking moments while working to notice the birds that are flying about or what little creatures are out for a walk. This connection helps to bring my focus away from the things that make me feel bad, angry, or hateful and to a place of relaxation. Working in the garden also makes me feel truly accomplished because I know what I am doing will provide us with food and a beautiful place to hang out.

What is the right way to nourish your spirit? There is only one right way to do it, so make sure you follow this rule exactly, Do what makes you feel happy, joyful, and at peace! That is the only rule. Don’t try to nourish your spirit at the bar getting drunk if every time you do you feel like shit the next day, do take a stroll through a used book store if the smell of the books makes your soul light up with the possible adventures contained in the pages. Don’t go take a long walk if you hate to hike, do sit outside in a beautiful garden and soak up nature that way. Go to church or don’t, meditate or don’t it really doesn’t matter what I suggest here because it is what nourishes YOUR soul no one can tell you how to nourish yourself.

I hope you can look at this as a reminder that you should be finding what makes you feel good, whatever it is, and making the time for it so that you don’t burn out and can tackle each day in the best mindset possible. Keep working on yourself so that you can get to the place that you want to be, the journey is long but it is yours so do it in your time.

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Self-Care Sunday February 13th, 2022

Many of us spend the majority of our day at work. If we are lucky we have a job we Love, if we are fortunate we have one we like most days. Plenty of people have a job because it is a job, a source of income, but no matter why you have your job some days going in feels like a death sentence. Maybe the work environment has become extra stressful, or you are having a bad day, and going to work is the last thing that you want. At these moments I say take a day!

If you can relate you may need a day off.

If you are like me and are in the U.S. you know that the view on sick days or mental health days is something that varies by company. There is no national plan that helps people take time when they need to, so they have to hope they get days through work, and even then you will risk not getting paid for the days that you do take. So what do you do if you really need a day? I say take it. If you need the money those hours would provide with you then try and switch shifts with someone so you don’t lose out but can still have that day you need. If you are like many people I know and are saving up your vacation days STOP! You have earned those days and you should take them if you are starting to feel stressed or burned out, you will feel better after you take some time. It is time to show people that it is ok not to be ok and need a day for yourself.

Taking some time to connect to nature can help you be ready for work

There are many other countries that have realized the health of their workers should come first since healthy, motivated workers actually work better and harder. Not all countries or employers care about this but we as employees should. We should take the time we have earned and when financially able take a day off even if it means no pay.

One reason I am starting my own business is so that I can have the freedom to have the schedule I want and need to function well at everything I do. I am lucky enough to be in a position that gives me the opportunity to do so, although I am even stretched thin trying to do it all. My hope is that one day with everyone’s voices working together we can help change how we are treated at work and have a national standard that helps to provide more time for self-care. Until then it is up to us to realize when we need a break and to be ok taking one, because you help no one by performing at less than your best.

I hope you read this and decide that yes you should come first so that you can have a better chance of enjoying the life you have been given.

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Self-Care Sunday, January 23, 2022

Another week in the bag. We had some crazy weather here last week with the snow and ice. The biggest issue my family had was not being able to get up the driveway for 2 days, but that turned into a fun time for the kids who got to use the driveway as a sledding area. We also got to go for a fun hike in the woods and found some interesting tracks in the snow. I really enjoyed being snowed in, even though I don’t like snow, because I was able to spend extra time at home doing things with the kids that we sometimes don’t get around to.

Now for the rest of the week, after finally getting up the driveway my week became a bit overwhelming and I had to really listen to my own advice from a few posts back. I had to remind myself that it is ok to say No to things that I am not in the mental state to handle.

For me, I had to wrestle with whether or not I could take an online class for my job. Now, this class is not required for me to do my job, but it will help me advance and get paid better. These are both things that are great for me, however, as I tried to prepare for the class I realized that I did not have the mental stamina to do well in such a course right now. The amount of work outside of the class time was going to be more than I could fit into my week and schedule.

I tried to explain this to my immediate supervisor who did not seem to hear what I was saying and gave me the advice of just do your best, which I knew I could not currently give. Thankfully I spoke with the store manager who assured me that it was not a requirement and although they would love to see me do the course it could wait until I was ready. This was great to hear because it took a huge weight off my shoulders and helped me to make my decision to drop the course even easier.

My new plan is to keep all of the worksheets and information from the class handy and just work through it at a nice slow pace when I have time. I will then when I feel mentally able to hold more information in my brain ask to be signed up again so that I can really do my best and be able to advance.

This leads me to my self-care for this week. This week is again about knowing what you can handle and remembering that it is ok to say No. It is also ok to seek out those that are in charge at your job and talk to them about what is going on and how you are feeling. I admit I probably waited longer than I should have to talk about this, I let myself get completely overwhelmed first. I tried to convince myself that adding this to my plate was ok, that I could handle it because I have always been good at school and studying. I had to remind myself that when I was in school I was also not homeschooling 3 kids, running a homestead, starting a business, navigating doctor and therapy appointments for the kids, and working 24 hours a week. I had much more time to devote to studying and learning in the way needed. So I shall not take the class now, but I will take the time to learn through experience and studying when I can so that when I take the class I am prepared for it.

Now that we have all been reminded to put ourselves first it is time for a coffee, a book, and a nap!!! Have a great Sunday!

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Self-Care Sunday, January 16th, 2022

Snow Day Edition

Have you heard? Or maybe you are in the thick of it right now, but we are getting SNOW! For some of my friends that stop by snow may not be a big deal. You probably live somewhere that has snow every year, or you are like me and grew up with it but now live somewhere much warmer (I admit I moved to warmer climates because I hate to shovel.) However here in NC specifically the non-mountain regions, snow is not something we get every year. In fact, it is such a big deal when they forecast more than a half-inch of snow everyone must immediately run to the store and buy all the milk and bread. Why milk and bread? I have no idea.

Now how does this snow day affect your self-care? Simple, if you are like me and live in a state where a flurry shuts down everything you may not get a chance to get out and do what you wanted to for yourself this weekend. I know we had to rearrange plans so that we still got to spend time with friends which is an important part of my self-care each week. You may be having to spend the entire time at home, with the kids, as they have video game day, which involves screaming and loud sounds emitting from the television. What are you to do?

Well here is my plan for my Snow Day. First I am going to try and get some much-needed work around the house done (I know not relaxing), which will then be followed up by some time to read. I am way behind in my reading so I will be locking the door and hiding from the sounds of video games so I can read for a bit. I may even take a much-needed nap. The nice thing about a snow day for me is not the snow, it is the fact that suddenly I don’t have to be anywhere. I don’t need to run any extra errands because driving there may be dangerous, or the stores may be closed. Instead, I slow down and just relax.

I hope that you also take a moment this weekend to just stop and relax, in fact, if you don’t have a snow day take one anyway. If anyone asks just say you are taking a snow day like your friends in NC. Tell me what you like to do if the weather is bad and you are stuck at home.

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Self-Care Sunday, January 2nd, 2022

2022 is finally here, and for many of us, it is a hope for a better possibly more normal year. Even if this is your hope for the year you need to be ready for the fact that it may be just as crazy and stressful for you, especially if you work in certain fields. So to start off this new year I feel like we need to take a moment and think about how we can work in self-care to our weekly or daily routine.

Many people are morning people and for those of you that are you can take this opportunity to give yourself a few moments of time to focus on yourself. Some good ways to start your day off more focused, centered, and ready for action can include the following:

My teas of choice recently…and yes I got the middle on because of Skywalker
  • Wake up 15 minutes early so you have time to relax and enjoy some coffee/tea or maybe write briefly in a journal
  • Exercise to start your day off. My husband enjoys getting up a few hours before work so he can enjoy some coffee go for a run and still have time to get ready for work
  • Take a short morning walk
  • Meditate or Yoga
  • Listen to your favorite music to help you get pumped up for the day
The gym is my escape

I don’t always get to wake up early and relax before starting my day because I work late at night and the turnaround can be very short. I do, however, try to get up early a few days a week and go to the gym either with my husband or son. It is really nice to start my day off going to the gym with my husband especially since our schedules are opposite one another, so even though I don’t get as much sleep I do get to spend time with him which makes the day better already.

For me, I must find my downtime when I can before going to work in the afternoon. I try my best to give myself at least 30min before I have to get ready for work to eat and either read or watch a little tv. It is at these times that the kids are also eating or playing outside. I try to make it the same time every day so that they know I will be relaxing for a little while before running off to work. Every so often when our schedule allows I will also try to sneak in a little nap, even if it is only 20 minutes.

my current waiting to be read pile!

If you are like me and can not always rise early then maybe you need to spend your downtime in the afternoon or evening. The choices at this time of day can be very similar to your morning routine but can also include things that you can spend more time doing.

  • Read a good book
  • Take a long shower or bath
  • Write in a journal or blog
  • Crochet
  • Call and talk with a friend
  • Take an evening walk and enjoy the sunset
  • Get your workout in now
  • Meditate
  • Drink a nice cup of tea
A work in progress. This is a Temperature blanket I started and have been working on

Today I want you to take a few minutes to think when you can add something into your day and post below what you are going to try and add-in. Then I would love to hear how this next week goes and what you have been able to add to your daily routine to help give you some time to focus on yourself.

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Self-Care Sunday, December 26th, 2021

To start today I want to be sure to wish everyone Happy Holidays. Many of us just had a holiday weekend filled with family and friends, some of you may have had your holiday celebrations earlier this month, while others may be getting ready for your celebrations. While I know we are all excited to celebrate and be around family and friends, some of which we have seen very little of over the last year, we must remember that after all the hustle and bustle of the day we still need to take time for a little self-care.

With the new year right around the corner, I want to get back to trying to remind us all to take that time we need to relax and recharge. When better to start this than after a whirlwind of a month that seems to include parties and family events every week. There is a reason that as much as having that time with family is fun it is also stressful and exhausting. We spend so much of this month cooking extra meals, trying to get last-minute gifts, or just preparing for a trip that by the time it is all over we are drained and need a recharge.

So, what do you do to recharge your batteries? How can you create that time for yourself while you may still be visiting family or have a few more events your presence is desired at? First, we have to remember that your me-time can be as little as 5 minutes just a few minutes to yourself can help you feel recharged and ready to go.

A few of the things I try and do when away from home and visiting family over the holiday’s include:

Taking time for a walk sometimes alone, sometimes with my husband. This is a great way to have some quiet time for yourself away from all the commotion. Getting out of the house and into nature is always a good way to refocus. While on your walk take notice of things you may normally pass by without a thought. Did you notice the birds? Or maybe the wind through the branches? Perhaps you have noticed how quiet the roads are on a holiday weekend. Taking time to focus on these things will relax your mind from the stress and busyness that may come from being with your family.

Take a nap! That’s right curl up in the bed, on the couch, or in a quiet corner and take a nap. I promise you to deserve it! I enjoy the fact that there are enough adults at my family’s house that I can get in a nap when I normally spend my day going from one thing to the next. I love having the opportunity to listen to my body when it says, “Hey you have been tired for weeks take a nap.”

Escape with a book. Hide out for 20-30 minutes and read that book that has been looking at you for months. Books provide a wonderful escape from the commotion around you. Many times with a good book it can be hours later you before realize there is a whole world you have forgotten existed.

Put on some music you love and just sit there enjoying the tunes. I love to listen to music, but I often have the competition of audiobooks or just kids talking to enjoy it to the fullest. While at my family’s house my kids often disappear with their cousins, and I can take the time to enjoy my music to the fullest. I can even combine this with my walk.

Finally, take that nice long shower/bath you never have time for. In fact, while you are there add in some of our amazing bath and body products to help you come out feeling refreshed and relaxed.

Whatever you choose to do to relax, remember to make time for it since you want to have a good time visiting family and if you are stressed and tired you will not enjoy your visit.

Self Care Sunday

Self-Care Sunday March 21st 2021

It is Sunday again already, and this week we are taking a break!!! No I am not going to skip posting this week but I want our challenge to be getting a break. There are a few rules for this break:

  1. This is not a 10 minute break where you hide from the world in your bathroom scrolling on Facebook. You must take an actual break. Take a day off from work or life or whatever.
  2. Don’t make plans on this day. This is your day. Just get up and go with it.
  3. Don’t dwell on what needs doing. Take a break from thinking of all you have to do, unless there is something that is vital to your continuing existence that must be done, it will all still be there.
  4. Enjoy your freedom for 24 hours.
  5. Make sure whatever you decide to do helps you to reenergize. For me I like just reading and relaxing, maybe even working in the garden and enjoying the outside.

That’s it. The challenge is to take a break!!! I know some of you may not be able to, or be willing to take a day off from work but go ahead and clear your weekend schedule of Everything. Now take you break and come back to your life ready for anything!!

Self Care Sunday

Self-Care Sunday March 14th 2021

My favorite way for self-care is to spend some time without the kids. I spend all week with them and love it but by the weekend I am done answering questions or hearing about Minecraft. To ensure that I get some good adult time I go just about every Sunday to meet up with friends to get coffee. This is something we started before Covid hit. We of course had to take a break when things where shit down, but started back up as soon as we were able. We have been meeting outside to be sure that we had room and could feel comfortable getting back together. My husband comes as well and we spend a few kid free hours getting to have adult conversation.

This week my challenge for you is to find some time to get together with friends, if you have kids leave them at home. I know many people have still been avoiding going out and there are still restrictions in areas, but get creative! Sometimes the best form of self-care is seeing and being with your friends. Following guidelines in your area, you can find ways to meet up safely, perhaps an outdoor park, or sitting distanced outside of a coffee shop. If you are nervous about seeing people in person set up a video call. Please know I am not urging any of you to do things outside of your comfort zone, but I also know that so many of us have been isolated, we may have forgotten to find a way to connect with our friends.

Stop by here or on Facebook and let me know if you were able to connect with friends this week!